I'm Making Assumptions.

I have to say, my excitement is mounting as the number of days in between me and an airplane (or two) to Oklahoma dwindles. I have received a fairly good description of my quarters from the Captain, as well as of the environment as a whole, so I’m anxious to see how my mental image compares to the real thing.

Sight unseen, here’s what I expect from Lawton, Oklahoma, and the surrounding area:

• Constant wind. I can always tell when Spike is talking to me outside, because his end of the conversation goes something like this: “Today, I whhhhaaaaaa whha whaaaaa and I found out that next wha whhhhaaaaaaaa whaaa whhhhaaaa so I guess, eventually, we’ll whhhaaaaaa whhhhhhha whaaa wha whaaaaa artillery.”

• A disconcertingly open landscape. I’ve lived the vast majority of my life in North Carolina, where there are lots of trees and, depending on where you are, anything from rolling hills to outright mountains. However, I’ve heard from multiple sources that Oklahoma is very flat, and lacks NC’s abundance of arboreal verdance. It’s a prairie, I guess. So I won’t be able to see what’s around the next bend, because there won’t be any bends.

• At least a few tornado drills. Well, this is Oklahoma...and there have been a fair amount of tornadoes there in the past few days! (I've been watching the weather reports.) In the event of an actual twister, I believe that Spike and I will probably not stand outside and declare, "Do your worst! I dare you to hit me with a flying cow!" Instead, I suspect we'll either make our way to the nearby high school, or (if things are getting really dicey) hide in the bathtub covered by the mattress. That's what they told us to do in elementary school, anyway.
  

• A mixed bag of shopping opportunities. Yes, I’m female, and I asked what stores were going to be available to me. Apparently there’s a mall, and not one, but two Ross’s. To an avowed bargain hunter like yours truly, that’s very good news on the home décor front and the clothing front! HOWEVER—and this is a big however—there is no Target. And they call it civilization. Blasphemy. I’m sure that all of this blog’s female readers (and some of the male ones too) understand my horror, so I’ll stop lamenting and leave it at that.

• The makings of a temporary home. I have to brag on the Captain—he has really done his level best to get everything ready for my arrival. A brand-new condo (with stainless steel appliances!) in a very safe neighborhood, a new printer for my office, a birdfeeder, and even some potted plants, herbs, and vegetables await me.

• A surprising amount of fun! I have to make a confession—I never thought of Oklahoma as being a “fun” state. I mean, I don’t know anyone who has gone there for vacation unless there are relatives to visit. So imagine my surprise to hear about the following: the world’s “best” hamburgers in a nearby town called Meers, a wildlife refuge with free-roaming bison, hiking trails, and a miniature replica of Jerusalem (yes, that Jerusalem). Plus, Lawton is only an hour and a half away from Oklahoma City, so Spike and I plan on Harley-ing our way up check it out.

Hopefully my assumptions aren't too far off the mark. If they are, my apologies to the Sooner State. In any case, we shall see in three and a half days!