Foolproof!

Spike and I have come up with a new planning-for-the-future system. Actually, I lied. The credit for this one must go to the Captain and only the Captain.

You see, he had an epiphany the other day. He told me, "Back when I was in officer training I scoffed at the Airborne guys...said I never wanted to jump out of a plane. And then I got sent to the 82nd Airborne, all praises be its name. Then, we came to Fort Riley and I visited the Cavalry museum one day while you were working. I was unimpressed, and I came home and told you I didn't want to be in a Cav unit. Right?" (Here I dutifully nodded my head.) "So, of course, now I'm a rear detachment commander for a Cav unit. So guess what, wife?"

"What, husband?" I asked eagerly.

"I don't give two craps about Hawaii!"

Pure brilliance. Clearly, if we both vehemently deny that we don't want to go to Hawaii, the Army will send us there. For the record, I also don't want to go to Korea, Italy, or Germany. Just for starters.